Stan must get Cartman to donate one of his kidneys to save Kyle's life while everyone in town is addicted to new-age medicine run by an old woman and her "Native American" co-workers. Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison becomes a romance novelist after getting fired from teaching for his incompetence and his actions in the previous episode.
Guest Stars: Cheech Marin as "Chief Running Pinto" and Tommy Chong as "Carlos Ramirez"