13 Hardly Kirk-ing

Marge takes the family out on a TV-free day after finding Maggie watching a DVD from the Baby Poindexter collection, which, according to the news, was pulled for being ineffective in educating children (even though Homer likes it because it is not merchandise-driven like so many kids' shows today). A flashback reveals the material in question sent a younger Bart into a drooling fit while Lisa turns the presentation's packaging into an interactive diorama. The family goes to a bookstore, where Homer becomes fascinated with hidden-object puzzles and begins using his skills to find people and common objects in the real world.

Meanwhile, Bart hangs out at Milhouse's place. While bored, Bart squirts some epoxy in Milhouse's hair. Bart gives him a haircut to remove it, but he removes most of Milhouse's hair as a result, making him look just like his father Kirk. With Bart's help, Milhouse dresses up like his dad, becoming taller with the help of homemade stilts made from paint cans and making his voice sound like Kirk's by tying a tie tightly around his neck (though if the tie is put too tightly around his neck, he sounds like Duffman). Bart uses this to his advantage, as Milhouse, looking like an adult, is now able to commit adult activities. They bully Homer, purchase items for school bullies Jimbo, Kearney, and Dolph, and participate in municipal voting.

When Lisa wishes to go to downtown Springfield, Milhouse is able to buy tickets for himself, Lisa, and Bart. He collects a portion of the class action settlement being paid out to people who bought Baby Poindexter DVD's, but the money he receives is not enough to buy food for the three of them. They are forced to attend a condominium sales presentation for a free breakfast, but find that the doors have been locked to prevent them from leaving. The saleswoman, thinking Milhouse is an adult, attempts to seduce him. Homer and Marge, realizing the children are missing, rush to find them. Homer stops by for the free meal, rescuing the three children by coincidence. Milhouse later apologizes to Kirk for impersonating him, and admits that he wants to grow up to be just like him.